The People News, a free newspaper serving Cleveland Tennessee (TN) and Bradley County Tennessee (Tn).





Of Bradley County Tn.


MAY  2006

                            The People News, a free newspaper serving Cleveland and Bradley County Tn.

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REALM OF REALITY

ROLLING ON A RIVER

DROWNING AT THE PUMP JUST DON'T BLINK

by Toneeke Henderson

Howdy!!! As Minnie Pearl would say. Have you ever just wondered why people do and say the things they do.

Take for instance the picture in this article. It is not the actual car in the story but a very good lookalike.

This story is about a lesson all to old that too many people are thinking they still live in the forties and fifties when people were able to leave their doors unlocked at times.

Our son who was in Athens, was gonna be just a minute, like we have all

said at times but during that minute he got a phone call that made it a couple of minutes longer. He hung up and went outside the office and whoa, blink-blink! His car had vanished, it had become officially zapped from the planet... STOLEN.

He had seen a blonde gal with a hat on very suspicious looking, lurking in the parking lot, she had thrown something away and he got it, thinking well, perhaps her finger prints will be there. The next day a man in Cleveland had his truck stolen and reports of a gal with the same description had been in the parking area as well.

Toneeke Henderson

No, neither vehicle has been found as of yet, so if you are inclined to be a hero, you might want to do a young family a favor and let us know if you have seen or know who may have this car. You can contact me through the e-mail at the end of this article. Here is the information on the stolen car. It is a 1995 Chrysler Concord. The last three digits of the VIN number are 764. The McMinn County Tag number is TLK-009. The color is like

Champagne and some side moldings are missing. The right front bumper is cracked revealing the yellow under color. And a blue scrape of paint on the left.

The person that took the car would have sold the babies car seat and the tools that were in the trunk. Who knows, maybe it's a new  kind of car theft ring in which methamphetamine users are stocking by selling hot cars for rocks and quick cash. I feel sorry for the person who took it and the one who may buy or trade from them.

He had just filled his tank up and well, I suppose that gave them a full tank to flee on. Maybe the gas and oil companies are paying crooks to steal cars and resell the gas at a higher price. What, you don't think so! Well some lady on the TV said that's what people should do.

Gas stations had fewer problems with drive offs when gas was where a working person could afford it. I mean, geezers guys, how high does it have to go. We are not in California, nor Texas, nor Florida. We are gonna all have to start riding bicycles again. OK, I may still need training wheels as I have a tendency to overturn a two wheeled riding machine as my legs are too short to touch the ground. I can still hear my husband and son laughing at me when I rolled through the driveway without the bicycle. Gals, never wear a dress when performing this stunt, as it can be quite embarrassing.

I guess at my age I should come to realize that I will never get any taller no matter how much oatmeal I eat. In fact every year that we measure the grand children against the wall to see how much they have grown, we should measure me, grandma, against the wall to see how much shorter I have become. But what is nice at times is when I get to meet other ladies who are a lil' shorter then me.

Have you upgraded your cell phones or PC lately? Well, I had my new every two year

upgrade come ready to do, so I did it. I have a nice new phone with so many features it asks me what I would like for breakfast, calls me when it's ready and spits out an envelope with a wafer in it. I open it up place it on my tongue and Walla, I have just had breakfast. Of course, depending on the newest releases on the music forum will determine how I will receive my lunch and dinner. Not sure what the I pod capabilities will be but I ain't eating no eyes. It has the shock mode so you can time to go off while you are driving home and about to fall asleep from being so tired. Why, it'll jolt ya right outa the drivers seat into the trunk. Yes I have officially been upgraded.

By the time my next two years are up for upgrading I will have just figured out all the features of this one. I believe they will have floaters by then, no not for water waving but for mid air. They will hover like space craft and respond to key words like those fancy cars do, and you won't need that map finder in your car. Heck, my phone will probably make me sit in the back seat and drive the car for me. Heck, they already have one called the Razor -  now that's a quick way to shave. If they could make  one to pay the bills, that would be even better.

Since we are running so close to the deadline again I will close on this note for summary.
I think if we all eat more beans and grind that corn we could drive many places for free, if you believe in yesterday and the way things were, don't blink because your mind may be stolen.

Hard lesson learned is never ever leave your keys in the car or leave your car unlocked. In this day and age nothing seems to be safe or sacred.

If you want to live forever become a cell phone with PayPal equipped.

Finally, if you think I am gonna try a bicycle; think again - I am sticking with my broom.

To contact Toneeke, e-mail:
feedback@toneeke.com

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